07/10/06 5 Lady Venoms

5 Lady Venoms (19??), directed by Cheng Chi Chiu

watched w/ Leslie (partially); VHS (personal copy) @ home

This hard-to-follow martial arts action film is a very hard-to-find rarity floating out in the cult classic internet world...as my searches for extra facts about the movie were thwarted. There is very little out there to describe this film, which was again part of a rather large store-display martial arts video collection given to me by my good friend Jason some years back. Speaking of some years back, I'm not even sure when this film was made, but my VHS version was distributed by Xenon Pictures (www.xenonpictures.com) and has the late-90's imprint on it (yeah, this was made somewhere in the very grainy 70's at least). Anyway, the tag line tells of how these "lady venoms" are much more venomous than the male...basically a reptilian counterpoint to the old adage of "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." With all the fire & brimstone & snake-bites aside, this action flick packs quite a punch, and kick, and stabbing, and shooting, and so on. The cautionary tale centers on one drug lord Fung who eliminates another rival boss Lau for his valuable waterfront property. However, in all of Lau's stable of thugs...it is his little ol' daughter Angel who teams up with four other kung-fu beauties to start laying the smack down. Although, there doesn't seem to be just five ladies, but rather to gangs of girls who at first clash then come together for the common enemy that is man. They take care of all the dregs of society in the pimps, pushers, abusers, and fashion victims. These bad-ass bombshells are a unique (not to mention tattooed and bathing-suit clad) special forces squad of divers, fighters, and lovers. They kick some serious ass. Speaking of getting your manhood handed to you, prior to the film, Leslie & I partook in a few rounds of the mental martial art of chess. I lost, therefore I'm man. The ladies keep on winning this evening...but maybe next time. It's all worth it (the beatings I mean) to see the scantily-clad vixens (I mean venoms) battle in various stages of bathing suit attire, with clothing being torn left & right. Now, if I can only convince Leslie to play chess that way.

3 out of 5 stars