08/06/06 High School Musical

High School Musical (2006), directed by Kenny Ortega

watched w/ Leslie & Rebecca; DVD (borrowed from Rebecca) @ home

After yesterday's praise for picking a delightful movie...I have to fault my sister Becca here for being...well, just being a pre-teenage girl I guess. Nothing wrong with that, it just seems to be in their nature (heck, I guess even older girls too) to enjoy ridiculously goofy high school antics, or musical numbers for no apparent reason, or the cute boy getting to be with the cute girl of his dreams...no matter what the rest of the in-crowd says! Yes, folks, I succumbed to the choice of my 11 year-old sister once again, to make her (and Leslie) happy...and wound up watching this junk. Not even the title could be clever...simply pointing out exactly what you were in for. Unfortunately for me, those two things were items that I have always despised...high school and musicals. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place, with nowhere to hide my eyes or cover my ears. I had to remain strong, and fight through this torture like any prisoner of war might have to. Chinese water torture could have been better than this, I can only imagine. Need I even describe the film? It's hokey from the get-go, and it never lets up with it's cheeseball factor running in the red zone the entire time. Yeah, they sing songs about falling in love, being from separate school clicks, basketball, bookworms, and the paramount year-end school play. All the actors (uhh, can I even say that? They're basically high school kids who think they're cool) are horrible, the songs bore a gaping hole into the side of your brain and fill it with garbage, and the dancing...well, I dare say the whole thing sickens me to no end. I have serious doubts about our youth and the future generations based solely on this glamorized headache. I couldn't even make fun of it properly, being constantly bombarded with juvenile sing-a-longs, corny jokes and brilliantly white-toothed smiles. Ugghhh, it was like a automobile accident between Barney's purple people eater bus and a Mini Cooper Mentos ad. For the sake of humanity, obey the speed limit and avoid the falling rocks that this film will provide. Stick to the status quo. Oh god, it's too late for me.

1 out of 5 stars