11/30/06 The Fountain

The Fountain (2006), directed by Darren Aronofsky

watched w/ Leslie; theater (Southpoint Cinemas, Durham, NC)

With Christmas shopping in full swing (well, for me, since I like to procrastinate), we were stranded pretty far from home with time dwindling down in order to watch a movie for the day...we stopped into one of those gigantic shopping mall cineplexes to avoid the crowds. What better way to avoid even the holiday season movie theater crowds (watching inevitably some crappy family-oriented animated film with talking ferrets or dumpsters and trying to hush sugared-up toddlers that are so bratty you want to slap the bejesus out of them) than by selecting the most overly pretentious art-house flick that has no business being shown at such a conglomerate theater?! Well, considering this is a studio release, and done by a director who has been much anticipated after such classic indie films as "Pi" and "Requiem For A Dream," this should be nothing less than fantastic. And, well, aside from the overall length of the film, it was. A completely surreal and trippy intergalactic and cross-generational love story that is told so beautifully and poignantly that very little dialogue is even necessary. Even the minor dialogue (strike that, mostly inner monologue) that is present is spoken in interrupted hushes and murmurs. Hugh Jackman plays Tom, a doctor who is so wrapped up in his work with finding a cure for his wife's (Rachel Weisz) cancer...that the lines between reality and dreams become very very blurred. The story itself does not hold us just to the one storyline, but three parallel ones that jump spans in the millenium all searching for some deeper meaning within life, spirituality, death, and science. That fragile balance of all those subjects tears at the man's heart, as he wants nothing more than to appreciate life's sweet pleasures with his lovely wife, yet must wrap his analytical head around all of its subtle inner-workings. The tree of life plays an integral part of the man's journey, his dreams of his love, and the delicate tapestry of humanity's connections. Now, all that artsy mumbo jumbo aside...this film is an utterly breathtaking "experience" film. Just sit back in the theater seat and soak in the entire screen. Let yourself be drawn into the pictures and the ideas...get lost in the silence...fall asleep, get high, never blink, whatever you need to do. It is a heart-wrenching story, but with an air of lightness and soul-searching that was refreshing...a well invited change of pace from the horrendous throngs of holiday shoppers. Maybe the bratty kids need to sit & chill with this subliminal mind-meld of a film, and not the animated singing doorknob.

5 out of 5 stars

11/29/06 Menace II Society

Menace II Society (1993), directed by Albert & Allen Hughes

watched solo; DVD rental (North American Video) @ home

A big fan of the Hughes Brothers work ("Dead Presidents" and "From Hell"), I never did catch this original piece from them, that was to prove the most gritty and raw of their thematic elements. What I thought would be just another entry into the urban ghetto dramas that followed up the excellent and hard-hitting "Boyz N The Hood" or "New Jack City," this film actually had more comparisons to another excellent piece of violent work. I must also admit here that I totally stole this comparison and ideas from a review I read on a website, but I found myself completely agreeing with the statements. This gritty urban drama paralleled something like Scorsese's "GoodFellas" more than anything else. What we have is a similar theme by showing a flawed main character that has been raised and nurtured in a violent community around him, at heart a good person yet caught up in the seedy dealings that are all around. The anti-hero that is presented is trying to get out of his respective hell that he has created, but inevitably falls victim before fully breaking free. As Ray Liotta's character Henry played a narrative that showed two sides to a gangster lifestyle, so does the main character here Caine. Caine is a young man trying to avoid the harsh trappings of the ghetto and its crime-ridden warfare of gang-banging and drugs, on the verge of his high school graduation and perhaps escaping this particular world. Lead into many unwanted situations of crime by his crazy friend "O-Dog," influenced at a young age by his imprisoned older brother, and pushed out of his loving surroundings by his grandparents when they learn about his lifestyle, Caine is faced with a frightening reality. Being smart enough to alleviate his current plight, Caine must choose whether he can leave that life behind and make his future better...or succumb to the status quo of the ghetto. It's a very harsh and biting tale of brutal youth in urban society, who are trying to live a normal life amidst vicious surroundings. While not at all as impactful as "Boyz N The Hood" can prove to be, it is nonetheless a very important landmark film...plus it was a key part of the Wayans Brothers eventual spoof of the aforementioned genre. Cue the longest movie title ever. "Don't Be A Menace To South Central While Drinking Your Juice In The Hood" ring a bell?

3 out of 5 stars

11/28/06 Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! (1965), directed by Russ Meyer

watched solo; VHS rental (North American Video) @ home w/ Leslie (partially)

Wanting desperately to get some Russ Meyer and buxom depravity into the Challenge before the year was up...I managed to squeak this not-so-squeaky-clean cult classic by the censorship bureau, and partake in all its hot rod glory. What else could you expect from the film that spawned the name of a 80's hair metal band, but the utmost in debauchery and exotic violence?! There doesn't have to much of a plot to a Russ Meyer film, just cleavage...and perhaps a whip, or a gun, or a fast car, or a loose woman, or a vengeful menace, or a creepy dude, or an upbeat score, or ample cleavage, or tales of seduction and temptation, or ample cleavage...well, I guess really there is quite a lot to a Russ Meyer film. What we have on grandiose display here are three go-go dancers (Varla, Rosie & Billie) who are joyriding through the desert looking for some action and breaking all kinds of rules. Playing up his usual strong-minded women in the lead roles, Meyer takes us on a murderous rampage with the three women, who will stop at nothing to get what they want. After encountering a young couple on their travels, they challenge the man to a drag race...with the prize not only his life, but taking his beautiful lady hostage for their bidding. Then they happen across an old geezer and his two sons (one gruff, one idiot) and the supposed trove of money that they have holed up on their property. What the ladies don't count on is that the old timer and his boys have their own agenda (and creepy intentions) with the buxom beauties, and the battle is on! It's a fast paced tale of seduction, violence and craziness...and did I mention ample cleavage? Russ Meyer, you are a genius.

3 out of 5 stars

11/27/06 Galaxy Quest

Galaxy Quest (1999), directed by Dean Parisot

watched w/ Leslie (partially); VHS (Leslie's copy) @ home; suggested by Leslie & Jason

This is one of those comedies that people have talked about for years, saying that it's pretty funny...but by all trailers I had ever seen, it seemed like something that would be completely dumb and I wouldn't like it. Plus, it has Tim "the Toolman" Allen in it...so there's a strong possibility that it was going to be utter crap. I have to say though, it wasn't half bad. In a crazy case of mistaken identity and alien life forms, a group of washed up sci-fi TV-show stars find they have become something bigger than any of them could have ever imagined. Some eighteen years after their show was canceled from the airwaves, the group is struggling to stay in the public's consciousness by appearing at cheesy sci-fi conventions and store openings. Wallowing in their own despairs and getting on each other's last nerves, the fictional space crew is thrust into a real-life intergalactic war when a group of true space aliens comes to Earth to gather them for a mission. Thinking that the broadcast signals of their original TV-show were actual historical documents of gallant space warriors, the race of Thermians zap the crew onto their space craft where they are to battle the evil General Sarris and his armada. The ensemble cast is a mix-match of the same quirky ensemble crew they portray in the film...Tim Allen as the pompous and hung-over superstar captain, Sigourney Weaver as the never-taken-seriously bombshell, Alan Rickman as the uber-brilliant and over-looked sidekick, Daryl Mitchell as the cool and quippy youngster, and Tony Shalhoub & Sam Rockwell thrown in the mix for laughs. The beauty with the comedy comes in its simplicity at poking fun at its own genre and fans. The sci-fi Trekkies-esque nature of the war caused by a TV-show that was made into a film...never takes itself too seriously, and never hesitates to make fun of well...itself. Eat your heart out sci-fi geeks, maybe some day you really can save the world. Or, maybe you will die a virgin, you never know.

3 out of 5 stars

11/26/06 Your Friends & Neighbors

Your Friends & Neighbors (1998), directed by Neil LaBute

watched solo; DVD rental (North American Video) @ home

First off, since this has absolutely nothing to do with the title of or plot therein of this movie, I thought it was at least coincidental that the title does lend to the connections in my life today. What I am rambling on about is that my friends (and not neighbors) in real life today are very much in my thoughts...as I have found out that my best friend & his wife are the proud parents (for the second time over) of a beautiful baby girl! Congrats to the web page master of this Challenge...while I've been devoting a year to watching other stories of life...he's been living one as a father. Not too shabby, but I'd like to see him try keeping his eyes glued to a TV-set for over a year. I'm just kidding...but I digress as usual. Speaking of keeping your eyes glued to a storyline...so is usually the case with any of director Neil LaBute's films of a stage-like character-driven quality. LaBute is responsible for some of modern day's most intriguing, hard-hittingly blunt, and questionable tales of morality in cinema. Blossoming as a playwright, and tackling subject matter that is in-your-face with conversational dialogue, LaBute was an indie hit with his first film "In The Company Of Men." He then followed up with this caustic tale of marital un-bliss, with people cheating on and lying to each other left & right. Oh a joyous piece it was...nont really. It's so sad that couples can be like this, and not just playing it up for the art's sake...but that people can generally be miserable a-holes if you let them. No one in this film deserves your sympathy or your understanding...they just are who they are, warts and all. The bitter/apathetic couples are played by Ben Stiller & Catherine Keener (Jerry & Terri) and Aaron Eckhart & Amy Brenneman (Barry & Mary). Unhappy with each other, the couples begin a dangerous game of infidelity, hoping to find the missing piece sexually in their sad monogamous lives. Thrown into the mix are exotic art gallery owner Nastassja Kinski (Cheri) and arrogant chauvinist Jason Patric (Cary) for good measure, and sexual tension. Oh, and clever Neil LaBute had to keep all the characters' names in a rhythmic pattern. Anyway, the women are unhappy and jumping into bed with obnoxious dudes who sit around the gym locker room trading conquest stories. It's a very blunt and matter-of-fact presentation of humanity's faults, done in every way that of a theatrical play...giving you someone to despise and never to become. There are artful cinematic elements that pop up within the converging storylines and agendas, where every character has their turn speaking with the exotic Cheri at an art gallery exhibition. Each person comments directly (or sometimes through innuendo indirectly) on a piece of art, only to reveal a piece of their unique personalities and tendencies. It's a fractured tale, yet powerful enough to keep you focused on disliking all the participants. Yeah!

3 out of 5 stars

11/25/06 The 13th Warrior

The 13th Warrior (1999), directed by John McTiernan

watched solo; DVD (borrowed from parents) @ Leslie's Dad's house (Havertown, PA)

Another day of vacation spent relaxing, catching up with relatives and loved ones, eating way too much food, and flexing the old brain muscles on Scrabble word placements. It's been a quite eventful day and evening, full of fun and driving around the great state of Pennsylvania. Alas, I'm getting towards the end of my Challenge, and the hassle of sticking a feature-length film viewing into my already busy vacationer's schedule can be taxing. What's worse is when everyone gets to rub it in that they get to go to bed early and slumber peacefully, while I still have to stay up until midnight to finish watching my movie. It takes a true warrior's spirit to take one for the team like that...especially when the TV in the house is on the fritz, and my portable DVD player is not charged fully...thereby making me lay very close to a wall outlet (uncomfortably I might add) in order to see 'til the last minute of film. That warrior spirit (while having nothing whatsoever to do with the actual film) is on display both in my stamina and the film's title. This epic (both in scope of the Crichton novel, and apparently in blockbuster filmmaking budget flops) undertaking has Antonio Banderas in the lead role of Ahmed Ibn Fadlan blah blah blah (the dude has 20 names). Ahmed is an Arab ambassador in 922 A.D., who is sent to make a peaceful contact with a barbaric Viking tribe in the North. Upon meeting the clan, Ahmed is disgusted with their savage customs, unsanitary conditions, and overall...well, barbaric lifestyle. First cast as an outsider to the tribe, Ahmed soon learns that he can interpret the native Viking dialect in their conversations, shocking the men. It is then regarded as a sign that Ahmed will join their clan as the (you guessed it) 13th warrior who must help them fight off an ancient creature of the mist (the Wendol) who destroys the villages and feasts on the flesh of humans. It's either join the fight or die a terrible death for Ahmed, as he begins to be accepted and trusted by the Vikings. It's a rather basic plotline of epic proportions, and aside from its goofy over-postulating, is an enjoyable film. Of course, I may have just been bored all by myself watching it and wanted desperately to connect with some human life form...albeit in 922 A.D. and with Vikings who believe a giant nasty creature will eat their babies...but so what!?!

3 out of 5 stars

11/24/06 Left Behind

Left Behind (2000), directed by Vic Sarin

watched w/ Leslie, Jenny, Leslie’s Mom; VHS (Leslie’s Mom’s copy) @ Leslie’s Mom’s house (Bethlehem, PA)

In what is perhaps a convergence of three of the saddest events I could ever envision someone mustering up, I bring you this travesty. The ironic thing about this monumental convergence is the simple fact that the existence of this movie and subsequent blog about it are the very signs that the book portends to be the end of civilization as we know it. Simply put…we have the Apocalypse upon us, and only Mikey Seaver can save us. The three signs of this filmmaking apocalypse start with the fact that 80’s sitcom heartthrob Kirk Cameron (of “Growing Pains” infamy) has now become a born-again Christian with a penchant for spreading the word of God through horribly bad cinema and adopting tons of kids. Second, that cinematic penchant plays to all of our worst fears that the world is coming to an end (Armageddon style) and only the righteous will be saved, leaving the wickedly sinful on Earth to destroy each other and burn in Hell (uplifting as that sounds). And third, the embarrassing fact that I was about to sit down and watch this entire movie (which is sadly the first in a series of three riveting catastrophes) and have to live to tell about it. Yes, if that’s not signs of the Apocalypse, than my name is Buck Williams…which is funny, because that’s the name of our hero…Mike Seaver, I mean, Kirk Cameron, I mean Bible Man (no wait, that’s other 80’s sitcom guy Willie Aames (www.bibleman.com/) from “Charles In Charge”), I mean Buck Williams. Buck is a TV journalist who must report, then investigate the rash of recent mysterious disappearances of people off the face of the Earth. When he joins up with airline pilot Rayford Steele (don’t these names sound like porno names?) and his mistress flight attendant Hattie Durham (Cameron’s real life wife)…Buck must reach his trusted friend in scientist Dr. Rosenzweig. What he fails to see is that the trusted doctor may very well be in cahoots with multi-millionaires and the government in order to sell-out and help plan global domination on a corporate level. Super billionaire Nicolae Carpathia (super evil bad guy) is actually a super evil bad guy (wait, did I say that already?), and will stop at nothing to crush the world. Now if weren’t for that mangy mutt Scooby and his team of misfit born-agains lead by shaggy burn-out Buck Williams.You have to believe me that when hearing about this movie, I took it to be a giant hoax…something that was of epic urban legend proportions, and not something that people would ever take seriously and shape their entire careers around, teach classes on, or raise their children on its findings. “Left Behind” brings us to the forefront of religious, social, and moral struggle for the 21st century, all with a keen eye, acerbic wit and pathetic special effects. And the most laughable part of all, is that clean-cut Kirk is so into it…he tries his hardest to make this believable and serious, even going so far as to have an educational disclaimer about his ministry at the end of the piece. No longer the heartthrob, but slimy televangelist Kirk Cameron. Say it ain’t so Alan Thicke.

1 out of 5 stars

11/23/06 Hour Of The Wolf

Hour Of The Wolf (1968), directed by Ingmar Bergman

watched solo; DVD rental (North American Video) @ car ride (from Hammonton, NJ to Havertown, PA) & Leslie’s Dad’s house (Havertown, PA)

Going back to my college film course days, I wanted to revisit a certain class subject matter that always bored me to tears (or at least to drooling on my desktop as the lights dimmed to watch the film). You see, I took one film course strictly on famed Swedish director Ingmar Bergman and his obsession with the human psyche, life and death, and the ambiguity between illusion and reality. Basically, and mind you…I may have been too hungover to fully appreciate the heavy-handed surreal elements of his films and the incessant inner-monologue and introspection to his main characters…, his films were nothing spectacular to me. From what I can remember through my heavy eyelids were snippets of such “classics” as “Persona” and “Fanny & Alexander,” liking only his “Seventh Seal” for its stoic yet effective treatment. OK, so my uneducated brain perhaps could not comprehend the depth of the art it was processing, but I was never all that impressed with the Swede…but I have to admit, on this day of thanks (it’s Thanksgiving, if you haven’t checked a calendar lately or eaten so much turkey that the tryptophan has knocked you completely unconscious while watching football with relatives in the living room) that I appreciated how much I did like this film. And I know there’s probably two statements in that last sentence that could raise a few eyebrows…yes, I did in fact enjoy a Bergman film and secondly tryptophan can make you sleepy…but it probably doesn’t come solely from the turkey you greedy buggers. Now, to the fictional plot…the film centers on a struggling artist who is slowly losing his grip on reality, as he secludes himself on a desolate island cabin with his worried wife. The artist, very closed off to emotions with his wife, soon begins to allow her more into his deepest and darkest memories. The dark ambience is heightened by the late night witching hours, between midnight and dawn known as “The Hour Of The Wolf.” Even though I have family who live in Sweden, that’s my best interpretation of Swedish language…although I used to know how to count numbers fairly high thanks to my uncle…but I digress. Not unlike Bergman does in most his films. Anyway, some interesting side notes to the people in this movie…director Bergman (of no relation to other famous Swede film actress Ingrid Bergman, although his fifth wife was also named Ingrid…weird); actress Liv Ullmann (had child with director Bergman, but of no known relation to British funny woman Tracey Ullman); and finally stoic actor Max Von Sydow (of close relation to Mr. & Mrs. Von Sydow, his parents).

3 out of 5 stars

11/22/06 Vacuuming Completely Nude In Paradise

Vacuuming Completely Nude In Paradise (2001), directed by Danny Boyle

watched w/ Leslie (partially); DVD rental (Netflix) @ car ride (from Christiana, MD to Buena, NJ)

So, the trip begins to the great Northeast for our holiday vacation. I decided to pack along some shorter length films (for time constraints), and some interesting filmmakers' work (considering I wanted to include some more important directors on the year's Challenge). Both of those categories applied to today's selection, considering my selection was hindered by the ungodly amount of vehicular traffic that plagued the highways (I-95 is the devil). Since my leg of driving took a bit longer than originally intended (we just got stuck in bumper to bumper traffic for hours on end), we decided to watch a majority of it on the passenger's lap (Leslie) and my focus had to come in spurts as I would tap the gas pedal and then the brake incessantly. That all being said, I probably wasn't in the happiest of moods in commentary on said film...but all in all the quality of the picture left me disappointed. Boyle is a very talented and spastic director (the man behind the utterly raw & brilliant "Trainspotting," "Shallow Grave," "Millions," "The Beach," and "28 Days Later..."), but this one was an original British made-for-TV film that crammed the same chaotic cuts and spasms to barely 76 minutes (just made the cut, I checked). The plot was completely ludicrous, and disturbingly realistic in its filthy frankness. Pete is an aspiring club DJ who tries to make ends meet, and please his demanding stripper girlfriend, takes a job as a vacuum salesman who falls into a world of shady business practice and spiralling mental states. Pete is mentored by the appallingly crude Tommy (Timothy Spall), who will try any seedy tactics to make the sale and lie his way through life. All the immorality, sexual frustration, and bad hygiene lead Pete into a frenetic uneasiness...all to the edge of his own sanity. Tommy tries desperately to keep him under his wing, if only to further his own personal gain, to help win the coveted "Golden Hoover" award for best vacuum salesman of the year. All the twisted events finally culminate in a tragic banquet hall where Tommy becomes the one who loses his grip on sanity when his world begins to crumble before everyone's eyes. The movie starts off with much promise for dark comedy and bizarre camera-work, but in the end becomes a crass imitation of its own over-the-top bravado. There are still some classic scenes...my favorite being when Pete enters the old eccentric ladies apartment to find mountains (literally) of old newspaper collections, setting the room ablaze accidentally, trying to rescue the (unknowingly) dead woman, and having Tommy find him in his underwear...frantic, incoherent and with headlines of major world news pasted to his sweaty body parts. Yeah, you'd have to see it to understand it. That, and the title alone almost warranted another star...but alas, no "Golden Hoover" today.

2 out of 5 stars

11/21/06 Herbie Fully Loaded

Herbie Fully Loaded (2005), directed by Angela Robinson

watched w/ Leslie, Tim, Sarah, Rebecca, Mom & Dad; DVD (family's copy) @ parents' house (Southern Pines, NC)

Taking a much needed break off from work this week, with the Thanksgiving holiday approaching, Leslie & I decided to head down & visit with my family since we'd be going up to Pennsylvania to visit with her family for the holiday. Not only was this a chance for us to kick back & relax, spend quality time catching up with all my siblings (3) and parents (2) and pets (3). Full house, yes...and all kinds of chaos can ensue. One particular order of the chaos rears its ugly head in the form of sitting down to watch a lovely (see ridiculously painful) family film, so we can all share in my Challenge together. When put to a democratic vote (I was immediately ignored when I protested, beaten down by governmental force with my "outsider" opinions, and ultimately shunned to couchless vantage point to view the social debacle), the movie choice was soon to be a criticized political campaign after election. I demanded a recount, but no avail..."Herbie Fully Loaded" was chosen. Gone are the days of the lovable Disney ventures of the 60's, with the psychedelic Volkswagen Beetle with a comical mind of its own and goofy funnyman Buddy Hackett. Gone are the many zany sequels that endured, seeing Herbie not only "Ride Again," but sending him to "Monte Carlo," leading to his unfortunate case of going "Bananas," ultimately reincarnating himself with suave leadman Bruce Campbell in the driver seat in the 90's. Yes, gone are those lovably wacky treats...and here are the avoidable tacky bleeps of Lindsay Lohan's tragic career, directed by Robinson (of "D.E.B.S." fame). Lohan plays Maggie (who's strangely not all coked up or checking herself into rehab weekly like her real-life counterpart), a hot-rod teenager who's tried to give the wild race life up because of her father's (Michael Keaton) wishes for her safety. Pulled back into the adrenaline of the competition from pompous pro-racer Trip Murphy (Matt Dillon) and the egging-on of her best bud/geeky romantic interest (Justin Long, that Mac dude from the Mac vs. PC commercials), Maggie gets the help from a forgotten yet restored Herbie. It's a love/hate, give & take relationship that Maggie has with the car, but she soon realizes that they must work together as a team to make it & learn important life lessons. Now only if Lindsay's career could learn those same principles from a car in real life...perhaps I wouldn't have had to sit through this lackluster dud of a campy Herbie flick. Say what you want, but there will be no recount on these star ratings...and I was generous.

2 out of 5 stars